Petronius

PETRONII CENA TRIMALCHIONIS

Everything about the author of this book is strange and questionable. We have no real evidence for his prenomen being Gaius, the often used title "Arbiter" is probably nothing more than a transfer from the account Tacitus gives of a Petronius who was at one time consul and governor of Bithynia, Master of Elegancies at the court and eventually ordered to cut his wrists in a tub. That Tacitus',am is the same as the author of this book (not clearly named Cena "the Banquet" or Satyricon either, is questionable since the author of this book is a curious mixture of literary pretender, master of street slang such as we have no other in Latin, and I suspect of freedman origin. A note to the MS of the poet Persius says that one Petronius was his friend and perhaps mentor, perhaps the author or perhaps someone different

This book is broken and segmented at start and finish, although the middle large section is entirely clear to read. It was (we suppose) part of a ten volume set of the kind on novel Romans read in their leisure hours, and just this section turned up in the 17th c. in Yugoslavia, another surprise.

We know so little about street Latin. Plautus has vernacular mixed into his poetic drama, tens of thousands of Latin inscription give us some small hint of ordinary language, from there it is a great leap to the Latin of the Vulgate and much later Aetheria (or is it Silvia's) trip to the Holy Land. But mixed in with the fascinating common and slang language are chunks of a curious, formalistic poetry, a device apparently used in the Roman novel. But first and last, this book is fascinating, first rate reading and an inner peephole into the nouveau riche bourgeoisie of the first century A.D., the people who were the driving force sustaining Rome as the aristocracy became useless and impotent.

The Cena of Trimalchio

We start off with a long diatribe on "Education" delivered in a wild and oratorical fastion by someone denouncing the evils of the day loudly in the portico in front of a school, who screams---. I Num alio genere Furiarum declamatores inquietantur, qui clamant: 'Haec vulnera pro libertate publica excepi; hunc oculum pro vobis impendi: date mihi ducem, qui me ducat ad liberos meos, nam succisi poplites membra non sustinent'? Haec ipsa tolerabilia essent, si ad eloquentiam ituris viam facerent. Of course you ask: Where did the old soldier come from, eye gouged out and on a crutch? Well, this is cited as a typical example of a legal practice brief for up and coming Law Students, who willbbe courtroom orators. We have dozens of these Controversiae which were used in Roman education. For the ROman, Education meant for the law primarily, even Vergil was first trained as a law apprentice. OK if leading so eloquence, but as it is....

Nunc et rerum tumore et sententiarum vanissimo strepitu hoc tantum proficiunt ut, cum in forum venerint, putent se in alium orbem terrarum delatos. Et ideo ego adulescentulos existimo in scholis stultissimos fieri, quia nihil ex his, quae in usu habemus, aut audiunt aut vident, sed piratas cum catenis in litore stantes, sed tyrannos edicta scribentes quibus imperent filiis ut patrum suorum capita praecidant, sed responsa in pestilentiam data, ut virgines tres aut plures immolentur, sed mellitos verborum globulos, et omnia dicta factaque quasi papavere et sesamo sparsa. For a second we thought we had a crit on modern education, kids studying thing unrelated to life....... but wait. We are backl to a hypothetical debate Theme about pirates and oracles, sacrifices. But thena gain something which can touch our overstuffed modern poets, the honeyed word-balls, spiced and sprinked.

II "Qui inter haec nutriuntur, non magis sapere possunt quam bene olere qui in culina habitant. Pace vestra liceat dixisse, primi omnium eloquentiam perdidistis. Levibus enim atque inanibus sonis ludibria quaedam excitando, effecistis ut corpus orationis enervaretur et caderet. Nondum iuvenes declamationibus continebantur, cum Sophocles aut Euripides invenerunt verba quibus deberent loqui.

Is it the Liberal Arts, the cookery where we learn to write a fancy style with proper phrasing and matched wording, flowing page after page? THink of the old days when Lincoln wrote the great Speech on the back of an opened envelope finding just the right words with which he wanted to speak.

Nondum umbraticus doctor ingenia deleverat, cum Pindarus novemque lyrici Homericis versibus canere timuerunt. Et ne poetas quidem ad testimonium citem, certe neque Platona neque Demosthenen ad hoc genus exercitationis accessisse video. No Professor in the Ivy Walls of Academe had yet taught when Shakespeare wrote drama and Fielding clean limbed prose.

Grandis et, ut ita dicam, pudica oratio non est maculosa nec turgida, sed naturali pulchritudine exsurgit. Nuper ventosa istaec et enormis loquacitas Athenas ex Asia commigravit animosque iuvenum ad magna surgentes veluti pestilenti quodam sidere adflavit, semelque corrupta regula eloquentia stetit et obmutuit. Back to Rome: The "Asiatic style" hit Athens first, moved on to Rome and the fulsome style of Cicero and worse (fortunately lost). The Purists with Caesar were trying to restore prose to normal and natural use, as against the use of metical cadencing (the clausulae of Cicero) which were imitating metrical effects in oratorical speaking.

Ad summam, quis postea Thucydidis, quis Hyperidis ad famam processit? Ac ne carmen quidem sani coloris enituit, sed omnia quasi eodem cibo pasta non potuerunt usque ad senectutem canescere. Pictura quoque non alium exitum fecit, postquam Aegyptiorum audacia tam magnae artis compendiariam invenit."

It was all sick, sick, fed on stuff like this could not last and mature to a healthhy old age. And Painting (cf. Vitruvius's critique) had the same fate after the crazy Egyptians wrote the textbook for what was once a Great Art. The Grand Tirade is broken off by an interruption:

III Non est passus Agamemnon me diutius declamare in porticu, quam ipse in schola sudaverat, sed: "Adulescens, inquit, quoniam sermonem habes non publici saporis et, quod rarissimum est, amas bonam mentem, non fraudabo te arte secreta. Nih mirum si in his exercitationibus doctores peccant qui necesse habent cum insanientibus furere. Nam nisi dixerint quae adulescentuli probent, ut ait Cicero, 'soli in scolis relinquentur'. It is Agamemnon the Professor of Rhetoric who breaks in, blaming the teachers, who have been living with madmen critics, for doing all this. But if not so, the classrooms will be empty.

Sicut ficti adulatores cum cenas divitum captant, nihil prius meditantur quam id quod putant gratissimum auditoribus fore. Nec enim aliter impetrabunt quod petunt, nisi quasdam insidias auribus fecerint. Sic eloquentiae magister ----- nisi tanquam piscator eam imposuerit hamis escam, quam scierit appetituros esse pisciculos, sine spe praedae morabitur in scopulo. But the Prof. has to bait his line of lecturing, like the fisherman with the proper lure, or get off the podium, I mean the rock.

IV "Quid ergo est? Parentes obiurgatione digni sunt, qui nolunt liberos suos severa lege proficere. Primum enim sic ut omnia, spes quoque suas ambitioni donant. Deinde cum ad vota properant, cruda adhuc studia in forum impellunt, et eloquentiam, qua nihil esse maius confitentur, pueris induunt adhuc nascentibus. It is the parent who rush kids into the job market, and press that Well Rounded manner of speaking on the young before they are at all grown up.

Quod si paterentur laborum gradus fieri, ut sapientiae praeceptis animos componerent, ut verba atroci stilo effoderent, ut quod vellent imitari diu audirent, ut persuaderent sibi nihil esse magnificum quod pueris placeret. Iam illa grandis oratio haberet maiestatis suae pondus.

Slow learning, careful listening step by step to what is worth following, refusing to believe any of the thigns the kids now love as "cool", ---- then Language could get back its weight and majesty.

Nunc pueri in scholis ludunt, iuvenes ridentur in foro, et quod utroque turpius est, quod quisque perperam didicit, in senectute confiteri non vult. But now it all fooling around in school, until they are laughed at in the job market, and worse --- later they never admit that anything was done wrong.

END THE DOUBLE FUGUE ON EDUCATION

The storyline becomes vague and wandering at this point, parts sutured together from a broken manuscript tradition, on and out of alleys and whorehouses, until our three Juvenile very Delinquents (Ascyltos Encolpius and Giton) are invited to a rich man's dinner party, at which we pick up the thread:

Venerat iam tertius dies, id est expectatio liberae cenae, sed tot vulneribus confossis fuga magis placebat quam quies. Itaque cum maesti deliberaremus quonam genere praesentem evitaremus procellam, unus servus Agamemnonis interpellavit trepidantes et: "Quid? vos, inquit, nescitis hodie apud quem fiat? Trimalchio, lautissimus homo. Horologium in triclinio et bucinatorem habet subornatum, ut subinde sciat quantum de vita perdiderit!" Amicimur ergo diligenter obliti omnium malorum et Gitona libentissime servile officium tuentem iubemus in balneum sequi.

Trimalhcio's name is Neareastern, from Gr. tri "three" coupled with the semitic root "m_l_ch_" as in Moloch in the OT, or better malik "king" in several Semitic languages. He is thus "Thrice Royal One", a good example of the renently free slave who has become immensely wealthy in the new order of the first centiry A.C. Half ridiculous tasteless bourgeois, half crook, it is his house we are about the enter. They dress, Giton acts out role of their slave, and on....

Nos interim vestiti errare coepimus, immo iocari magis et circulis accedere, cum subito videmus senem calvum, tunica vestitum russea, inter pueros capillatos ludentem pila. Nec tam pueri nos, quamquam erat operae pretium, ad spectaculum duxerant, quam ipse pater familiae, qui soleatus pila prasina exercebatur. Nec amplius eam repetebat quae terram contigerat, sed follem plenum habebat servus sufficiebatque ludentibus. Notavimus etiam res novas: nam duo spadones in diversa parte circuli stabant, quorum alter matellam tenebat argenteam, alter numerabat pilas, non quidem eas quae inter manus lusu expellente vibrabant, sed eas quae in terram decidebant.

The ball game in a new manner, how the Roman rich play a game of catch.

Cum has ergo miraremur lautitias, accurrit Menelaus: "Hic est, inquit, apud quem cubitum ponitis, et quidem iam principium cenae videtis." Et iam non loquebatur Menelaus cum Trimalchio digitos concrepuit, ad quod signum matellam spado ludenti subiecit. Exonerata ille vesica aquam poposcit ad manus, digitosque paululum adspersos in capite pueri tersit.

Menelaus as Agamamnon's assistant is quite in the spirit of the inheritance of Greek higher culture! The portable urinal and towel-holder are minor accories for such a Man's lifestyle.

XXVIII Longum erat singula excipere. Itaque intravimus balneum, et sudore calfacti momento temporis ad frigidam eximus. Iam Trimalchio unguento perfusus tergebatur, non linteis, sed palliis ex lana mollissima factis. Tres interim iatraliptae in conspectu eius Falernum potabant, et cum plurimum rixantes effunderent, Trimalchio hoc suum propinasse dicebat.

As with many words in this book, propinasse is suspect, if accepted it would be perefect innfinitive of a hybrid verb pro+pino pinare filched from Gr. pino "to drink". Slop wine on the floor! but he adds " "The boys are drinking my health, see!"

Hinc involutus coccina gausapa lecticae impositus est praecedentibus phaleratis cursoribus quattuor et chiramaxio, in quo deliciae eius vehebantur, puer vetulus, lippus, domino Trimalchione deformior. Cum ergo auferretur, ad caput eius symphoniacus cum minimis tibiis accessit et tanquam in aurem aliquid secreto diceret, toto itinere cantavit.

What is the wierd little dwarf-like boy in an elegant four-man mini-carriage, in whose ear the Boss is whispering something private...... Boyfriend and concubinus as not uncommon, or some sortr of mascot? Sequimur nos admiratione iam saturi et cum Agamemnone ad ianuam pervenimus, in cuius poste libellus erat cum hac inscriptione fixus:

QVISQVIS SERVVS SINE DOMINICO IVSSV
FORAS EXIERIT ACCIPIET PLAGAS CENTVM. Written in the style of ancient legal wording, as if the XII Tabulae, orders for NO EXIT with an authoritarian flare. Of course anyone goes in or out from this drunken mansion without being noticed, this is for show, the Master's "dignitas".

In aditu autem ipso stabat ostiarius prasinatus, cerasino succinctus cingulo, atque in lance argentea pisum purgabat. Super limen autem cavea pendebat aurea in qua pica varia intrantes salutabat. Ceterum ego dum omnia stupeo, paene resupinatus crura mea fregi. Ad sinistram enim intrantibus non longe ab ostiarii cella canis ingens, catena vinctus, in pariete erat pictus superque quadrata littera scriptum

CAVE CANEM.

The Romans loved trompe l'oeil painting and did some of it fairly well, at least good enough to fool an open-mouthed (stupeo giving stupidus) youngster who ahd never been anywhere.

Non licebat considerare. Nos iam ad triclinium perveneramus, in cuius parte prima procurator rationes accipiebat. Et quod praecipue miratus sum, in postibus triclinii fasces erant cum securibus fixi, quorum imam partem quasi embolum navis aeneum finiebat, in quo erat scriptum:

C. POMPEIO TRIMALCHIONI SEVIRO AVGVSTALI CINNAMVS DISPENSATOR.

Trimalchio had been honored as member of the six man Board of Imperial Rites, and as such was in a position to receive important and impressive honorary gifts. He had one such put up here on the wall, a fake prow of a ship taken in the Punic Wars, all in order except the name of the donor: His own employee, the freedman steward Cinnamus. And while in the Inscripional Mode, he has added as below in offical lettered style, a weekly calendar indicating when the Boss is dining out.

Sub eodem titulo et lucerna bilychnis de camera pendebat, et duae tabulae in utroque poste defixae, quarum altera, si bene memini, hoc habebat inscriptum:

III ET PRIDIE KALENDAS IANVARIAS C. NOSTER FORAS CENAT,

The "inscription" in formal archaic style of something so trivial as the master dining out, is just another indication of Trimalchio's ineffectual grasping for status in terms of the old Republican framework. Nouveau riche tendency, probably true in general.

Ceterum ut pariter movimus dextros gressus, servus nobis despoliatus procubuit ad pedes ac rogare coepit, ut se poenae eriperemus: nec magnum esse peccatum suum, propter quod periclitaretur; subducta enim sibi vestimenta dispensatoris in balneo, quae vix fuissent decem sestertiorum. Retulimus ergo dextros pedes, dispensatoremque in atrio aureos numerantem deprecati sumus ut servo remitteret poenam. Superbus ille sustulit vultum et: "Non tam iactura me movet, inquit, quam neglegentia nequissimi servi. Vestimenta mea cubitoria perdidit, quae mihi natali meo cliens quidam donaverat, Tyria sine dubio, sed iam semel lota. Quid ergo est? dono vobis eum."

Even the Steward has assumed the grand manner, has his own "clients" who give him gifts, and is in absolute power in the small domain of his office. The slave...you can have him! As the Banquet proceeds we get a full inventories of novelties, luxious spending, and ridiculous whimsicalities, but we will now skip to some of the sections whcih document Latin as spoken in the current of conversation. This is oe of our rare insights into the latinity of freedmen under the Empire.

XXXVII Non potui amplius quicquam gustare, sed conversus ad eum, ut quam plurima exciperem, longe accersere fabulas coepi sciscitarique, quae esset mulier illa quae huc atque illuc discurreret.

" Vxor, inquit, Trimalchionis, Fortunata appellatur, quae nummos modio metitur. Et modo, modo quid fuit? Ignoscet mihi genius tuus, noluisses de manu illius panem accipere. Nunc, nec quid nec quare, in caelum abiit et Trimalchionis topanta est. Ad summam, mero meridie si dixerit illi tenebras esse, credet. Ipse nescit quid habeat, adeo saplutus est; sed haec lupatria providet omnia, et ubi non putes.

We find right off words which are puzzling, not in our normal Ciceronian vocabulary, like topants, perhas "darling" from the Greek ta panta "his all in all?". What about that odd mero meridie, "high noon" but the assonance calls forth mero "unmixed (wine)". Lupatria "whore" from the wolfish character of ROman prostitutes.

Est sicca, sobria, bonorum consiliorum. Est tamen malae linguae, pica pulvinaris. Quem amat, amat; quem non amat, non amat. Ipse Trimalchio fundos habet, quantum milvi volant, nummorum nummos. Argentum in ostiarii illius cella plus iacet, quam quisquam in fortunis habet. Familia vero -- babae babae! -- non mehercules puto decumam partem esse quae dominum suum noverit. Ad summam, quemvis ex istis babaecalis in rutae folium coniciet. Pica pulvinaris is "crow on his couch", a caw-ing henecking bird in his bed. Nummorum nummos, so many you can't use number to count, something like "$ sq.". Babae babae, Greek, perhas an "oi yoi". Nobody knows who the babaecali are, but they get thrown into a patch of brambles..

XXXVIII " Nec est quod putes illum quicquam emere. Omnia domi nascuntur: lana, credrae, piper; lacte gallinaceum si quaesieris, invenies. Ad summam, parum illi bona lana nascebatur; arietes a Tarento emit, et eos culavit in gregem. Mel Atticum ut domi nasceretur, apes ab Athenis iussit afferri; obiter et vernaculae quae sunt, meliusculae a Graeculis fient. Ecce intra hos dies scripsit, ut illi ex India semen boletorum mitteretur. Nam mulam quidem nullam habet, quae non ex onagro nata sit.

And then as now the nouveau riche becomes a Gentleman Farmer, with prize animals (Mafia race horses), rare things like hens' milk beyond imagination, and the cross-breeding which the Romans were known for. Sheep yes, but how about Greek bees?

Vides tot culcitras: nulla non aut conchyliatum aut coccineum tomentum habet. Tanta est animi beatitudo! Reliquos autem collibertos eius cave contemnas. Valde sucossi sunt.

Cushons? Not only Tyrian or scarlet, but the tomenta stuffing too! And his freeman pals, "juicy" also.

Vides illum qui in imo imus recumbit: hodie sua octingenta possidet. De nihilo crevit. Modo solebat collo suo ligna portare. Sed quomodo dicunt -- ego nihil scio, sed audivi -- quom Incuboni pilleum rapuisset, et thesaurum invenit. Ego nemini invideo, si quid deus dedit. Est tamen sub alapa et non vult sibi male. Itaque proxime casam hoc titulo proscripsit:

C. POMPEIVS DIOGENES EX KALENDIS IVLIIS CENACVLVM LOCAT
IPSE ENIM DOMVM EMIT.

That guy over there, he stole the cap from an Incubo, the spirit who hides treasure, and --- a millionaire. Just now under his master's SLAP (ritual at manumission", already pretty high and mighty. Next to his condo he put up this sign: FOR RENT, BOUGHT NEW HOUSE.

Quid ille qui libertini loco iacet? Quam bene se habuit! Non impropero illi. Sestertium suum vidit decies, sed male vacillavit. Non puto illum capillos liberos habere. Nec mehercules sua culpa; ipso enim homo melior non est; sed liberti scelerati, qui omnia ad se fecerunt. Scito autem: sociorum olla male fervet, et ubi semel res inclinata est, amici de medio. Et quam honestam negotiationem exercuit, quod illum sic vides! Libitinarius fuit. Solebat sic cenare, quomodo rex: apros gausapatos, opera pistoria, avis, cocos, pistores. Plus vini sub mensa effundebatur, quam aliquis in cella habet. Phantasia, non homo. Inclinatis quoque rebus suis, cum timeret ne creditores illum conturbare existimarent, hoc titulo auctionem proscripsit:

C. IVLIVS PROCVLVS AVCTIONEM FACIET RERVM SVPERVACVARVM."

That next guy, everything compleely mortgaged. Those Freedmen! Your investor's pot stop boiling, things slide and frienda----gone. Was an undertaker, lived like a prince. Finally selling out everything, the NOTICE.

A while later, as the wine flows and the tongues wag:

Ab hoc ferculo Trimalchio ad lasanum surrexit. Nos libertatem sine tyranno nacti coepimus invitare convivarum sermones. Dama itaque primus cum pataracina poposcisset: "Dies, inquit, nihil est. Dum versas te, nox fit. Itaque nihil est melius quam de cubiculo recta in triclinium ire. Et mundum frigus habuimus. Vix me balneus calfecit. Tamen calda potio vestiarius est. Staminatas duxi, et plane matus sum. Vinus mihi in cerebrum abiit."

While the Boss takes a leak, there is time to ask for more stories. Night life, go to the club, real (mundus=really?) cold, hot toddy is ebst overcoat, couple of slugs and I'm soaked. Note vinum --> vinus.

Excepit Seleucus fabulae partem et: "Ego, inquit, non cotidie lavor; baliscus enim fullo est: aqua dentes habet, et cor nostrum cotidie liquescit. Sed cum mulsi pultarium obduxi, frigori laecasin dico. Nec sane lavare potui; fui enim hodie in funus. Homo bellus, tam bonus Chrysanthus animam ebulliit. Modo, modo me appellavit. Videor mihi cum illo loqui. Heu, eheu! Vtres inflati ambulamus. Minoris quam muscae sumus. Illae tamen aliquam virtutem habent; nos non pluris sumus quam bullae.

Another diner picks up a thread: The bathman (baliscus) is a dry-cleaner (fuller's earth used to absorb dirt from clothing, beaten out with a stick). I teel the cold: Go suck! (the word is questionable, meaning clear). Utires inflati are ballons made from sheep intestines, now used for purist hot dogs and condoms. Bullae, "bubbles" and dying is ebullire animam.

Et quid si non abstinax fuisset! Quinque dies aquam in os suum non coniecit, non micam panis. Tamen abiit ad plures. Medici illum perdiderunt, immo magis malus fatus; medicus enim nihil aliud est quam animi consolatio. Tamen bene elatus est, vitali lecto, stragulis bonis.

Done in by diet, and the plures are the catalog of everyone who ever died. In every age it is the doctors who are to blame, Cato and Cicero and everyone.

Planctus est optime -- manu misit aliquot -- etiam si maligne illum ploravit uxor. Quid si non illam optime accepisset? Sed mulier quae mulier milvinum genus. Neminem nihil boni facere oportet; aeque est enim ac si in puteum conicias. Sed antiquus amor cancer est."

Master normally freed slaves on dying, hence at funeral a good show. Wife? A buzzard, but no sense being good, like throwing stuff in a well. Old love nips like a crab. Now we come to the Werewolf Story, told in conversational style, but with a more concerted thread than the previous conversations:

Cum adhuc servirem, habitabamus in vico angusto; nunc Gavillae domus est. Ibi, quomodo dii volunt, amare coepi uxorem Terentii coponis: noveratis Melissam Tarentinam, pulcherrimum bacciballum. Sed ego non mehercules corporaliter aut propter res venerias curavi, sed magis quod benemoria fuit. Si quid ab illa petii, nunquam mihi negatum; fecit assem, semissem habui; in illius sinum demandavi, nec unquam fefellitus sum. Huius contubernalis ad villam supremum diem obiit. Itaque per scutum per ocream egi aginavi, quemadmodum ad illam pervenirem: nam, ut aiunt, in angustiis amici apparent.

Words continue to appear, for which we are unprepared by our previous use of Latin: bacciballum ? "a round little thing", benemoria "nice mannered (mores)". But contubernalis is the "mate" or partner. (below) Scruta scit might mean "nice somethings..., use the context here. Apoculamus "roll? out of bed" at cock crow.

"Forte dominus Capuae exierat ad scruta scita expedienda. Nactus ego occasionem persuadeo hospitem nostrum, ut mecum ad quintum miliarium veniat. Erat autem miles, fortis tanquam Orcus. Apoculamus nos circa gallicinia; luna lucebat tanquam meridie. Venimus inter monimenta: homo meus coepit ad stelas facere; sedeo ego cantabundus et stelas numero. Deinde ut respexi ad comitem, ille exuit se et omnia vestimenta secundum viam posuit. Mihi anima in naso esse; stabam tanquam mortuus. At ille circumminxit vestimenta sua, et subito lupus factus est.

Nolite me iocari putare; ut mentiar, nullius patrimonium tanti facio. Sed, quod coeperam dicere, postquam lupus factus est, ululare coepit et in silvas fugit. Ego primitus nesciebam ubi essem; deinde accessi, ut vestimenta eius tollerem: illa autem lapidea facta sunt. Qui mori timore nisi ego? Gladium tamen strinxi et in tota via umbras cecidi, donec ad villam amicae meae pervenirem. In larvam intravi, paene animam ebullivi, sudor mihi per bifurcum volabat, oculi mortui; vix unquam refectus sum.

In larvam intrare "turn into a ghost" We kick the bucket, the Roman bubbles off his soul, pail or pot no difference in the result.

Melissa mea mirari coepit, quod tam sero ambularem, et: 'Si ante, inquit, venisses, saltem nobis adiutasses; lupus enim villam intravit et omnia pecora tanquam lanius sanguinem illis misit. Nec tamen derisit, etiamsi fugit; senius enim noster lancea collum eius traiecit'. Haec ut audivi, operire oculos amplius non potui, sed luce clara Gai nostri domum fugi tanquam copo compilatus; et postquam veni in illum locum, in quo lapidea vestimenta erant facta, nihil inveni nisi sanguinem.

Copo/caupo is an innkeeper, when he is compilatus or cheated he runs around like crazy, so he ran here...like a plucked chicken.

Vt vero domum veni, iacebat miles meus in lecto tanquam bovis, et collum illius medicus curabat. Intellexi illum versipellem esse, nec postea cum illo panem gustare potui, non si me occidisses. Viderint quid de hoc alii exopinissent; ego si mentior, genios vestros iratos habeam."

The genius is a guardian spirit which each person has, a personal and localized deity, so he swears by the other fellow's soul as it were. Now we come to Trimalchio's conversational Quasi-Autobiography, produced at the high point of the aprty when everyone is listening attentively:L

Sed vivorum meminerimus. Vos rogo, amici, ut vobis suaviter sit.

Nam ego quoque tam fui quam vos estis, sed virtute mea ad hoc perveni. Corcillum est quod homines facit, cetera quisquilia omnia. Bene emo, bene vendo; alius alia vobis dicet. Felicitate dissilio.

(aside to his wife) Tu autem, sterteia, etiamnum ploras? Iam curabo fatum tuum plores.

Sed ut coeperam dicere, ad hanc me fortunam frugalitas mea perduxit. Tam magnus ex Asia veni, quam hic candelabrus est. Ad summam, quotidie me solebam ad illum metiri, et ut celerius rostrum barbatum haberem, labra de lucerna ungebam. Tamen ad delicias ipsimi annos quattuordecim fui. Nec turpe est, quod dominus iubet. Ego tamen et ipsimae satis faciebam. Scitis quid dicam: taceo, quia non sum de gloriosis.

I was tall as this (flat Roman olive oil) lamp, oiled by face to make the beard grow faster. The Himself is ipsimus, a regular superl. of ipse, standard for the Master in colloquial, and he adds No Sex. But the ipsimae is his wife whom Trimalchio was "satisfying". Gloriosus is "boasting" not glorious, Plautus play Miles Gloriosus.

LXXVI "Ceterum, quemadmodum di volunt, dominus in domo factus sum, et ecce cepi ipsimi cerebellum. Quid multa? coheredem me Caesari fecit, et accepi patrimonium laticlavium. Nemini tamen nihil satis est. Concupivi negotiari. Ne multis vos morer, quinque naves aedificavi, oneravi vinum -- et tunc erat contra aurum -- misi Romam. Putares me hoc iussisse: omnes naves naufragarunt. Factum, non fabula. Vno die Neptunus trecenties sestertium devoravit. By this time (date of Petronius is still uncertain) grain on which ROme was dependent was being shipped from the Near East. and T. cashes in on the grain trade. Romans were poor sailors, stuck close to the shore and often wrecked.

Putatis me defecisse? Non mehercules mi haec iactura gusti fuit, tanquam nihil facti. Alteras feci maiores et meliores et feliciores, ut nemo non me virum fortem diceret. Scis, magna navis magnam fortitudinem habet. Oneravi rursus vinum, lardum, fabam, seplasium, mancipia.

Hoc loco Fortunata rem piam fecit: omne enim aurum suum, omnia vestimenta vendidit et mi centum aureos in manu posuit. Hoc fuit peculii mei fermentum.

"The yeast of my fortune", a badly mixed metaphor since yeast is from bakery and peculium as property comes from pecus "livestock".

Cito fit quod di volunt. Vno cursu centies sestertium corrotundavi. Statim redemi fundos omnes, qui patroni mei fuerant. Aedifico domum, venalicia coemo, iumenta; quicquid tangebam, crescebat tanquam favus. Postquam coepi plus habere quam tota patria mea habet, manum de tabula: sustuli me de negotiatione et coepi libertos fenerare.

I took my hand off the counter, stopped business and went into loan sharking.

Et sane nolente me negotium meum agere exhortavit mathematicus, qui venerat forte in coloniam nostram, Graeculio, Serapa nomine, consiliator deorum. Hic mihi dixit etiam ea, quae oblitus eram; ab acia et acu mi omnia exposuit Intestinas meas noverat; tantum quod mihi non dixerat, quid pridie cenaveram. Putasses illum semper mecum habitasse.

The phrase ab acia et acu "from thread and needle" means with infinite accurate detail.

"Rogo, Habinna (puto, interfuisti) Tu dominam tuam de rebus illis fecisti. Tu parum felix in amicos es. Nemo unquam tibi parem gratiam refert. Tu latifundia possides. Tu viperam sub ala nutricas. Et (quid vobis non dixerim) etiam nunc mi restare vitae annos triginta et menses quattuor et dies duos. Praeterea cito accipiam hereditatem. Hoc mihi dicit fatus meus.

Habinna's wife came through the loansharking deal from Trimalchio, but......! Astrology and fortunetelling were stronger than the old Religion at Rome, so Trimalchio has a reading on his lfie expectancy, his financial future etc. Around the world, this has not much changed, crystal ball, Tarot cards, the Zodiac.

Quod si contigerit fundos Apuliae iungere, satis vivus pervenero. Interim dum Mercurius vigilat, aedificavi hanc domum. Vt scitis, casula erat; nunc templum est. Habet quattuor cenationes, cubicula viginti, porticus marmoratos duos, susum cellationem, cubiculum in quo ipse dormio, viperae huius sessorium, ostiarii cellam perbonam; hospitium hospites capit. Ad summam, Scaurus cnm huc venit, nusquam mavoluit hospitari, et habet ad mare paternum hospitium.

The name Scaurus of the famous Aemilians gens calls up the associations of a Rockefeller preferring to visit here, rather than his own place on Long Island.

Et multa alia sunt, quae statim vobis ostendam. Credite, mihi: assem habeas, assem valeas; habes, habeberis. Sic amicus vester, qui fuit rana, nunc est rex. Interim, Stiche, profer vitalia, in quibus volo me efferri. Profer et unguentum et ex illa amphora gustum, ex qua iubeo lavari ossa mea."

Clever use of habeo: You have (money) / you are held (as wealthy). And all this wealth calls up the idea of Death, you can't take it with you, so he calls for the funeral clothes (vitalia, a curious euphemism) and they go on to a pre-enactment of his funeral, coffin and weepers and all as climax of this irrational evening's course.

A MILESIAN TALE

We have now an example of a kind of story which was very popular in this period, and left many traces in the later literature of Europe. Since this is fairly straight writing without the colloquial turns and problems of the above sections, it is printed straight through without commentary, and should be a good sample of Latin which can be read right on, if with careful attention, but avoiding the danger of mental translation.

Ceterum Eumolpos, ne sileret sine fabulis hilaritas, multa in muliebrem levitatem coepit iactare: quam facile adamarent, quam cito etiam filiorum obliviscerentur, nullamque esse feminam tam pudicam, quae non peregrina libidine usque ad furorem averteretur. Nec se tragoedias veteres curare aut nomina saeculis nota, sed rem sua memoria factam, quam expositurum se esse, si vellemus audire. Conversis igitur omnium in se vultibus auribusque sic orsus est:

The Story of the Ephesian Matron

"Matrona quaedam Ephesi tam notae erat pudicitiae, ut vicinarum quoque gentium feminas ad spectaculum sui evocaret. Haec ergo cum virum extulisset, non contenta vulgari more funus passis prosequi crinibus aut nudatum pectus in conspectu frequentiae plangere, in conditorium etiam prosecuta est defunctum, positumque in hypogaeo Graeco more corpus custodire ac flere totis noctibus diebusque coepit.

Sic adflictantem se ac mortem inedia persequentem non parentes potuerunt abducere, non propinqui; magistratus ultimo repulsi abierunt, complorataque singularis exempli femina ab omnibus quintum iam diem sine alimento trahebat. Adsidebat aegrae fidissima ancilla, simulque et lacrimas commodabat lugenti, et quotienscumque defecerat positum in monumento lumen renovabat. "Una igitur in tota civitate fabula erat: solum illud adfulsisse verum pudicitiae amorisque exemplum omnis ordinis homines confitebantur, cum interim imperator provinciae latrones iussit crucibus affigi secundum illam casulam, in qua recens cadaver matrona deflebat.

"Proxima ergo nocte, cum miles, qui cruces asservabat, ne quis ad sepulturam corpus detraheret, notasset sibi lumen inter monumenta clarius fulgens et gemitum lugentis audisset, vitio gentis humanae concupiit scire quis aut quid faceret. Descendit igitur in conditorium, visaque pulcherrima muliere, primo quasi quodam monstro infernisque imaginibus turbatus substitit; deinde ut et corpus iacentis conspexit et lacrimas consideravit faciemque unguibus sectam, ratus (scilicet id quod erat) desiderium extincti non posse feminam pati, attulit in monumentum cenulam suam, coepitque hortari lugentem ne perseveraret in dolore supervacuo, ac nihil profuturo gemitu pectus diduceret: 'omnium eumdem esse exitum et idem domicilium' et cetera quibus exulceratae mentes ad sanitatem revocantur.

"At illa ignota consolatione percussa laceravit vehementius pectus, ruptosque crines super corpus iacentis imposuit. Non recessit tamen miles, sed eadem exhortatione temptavit dare mulierculae cibum, donec ancilla, vini odore corrupta, primum ipsa porrexit ad humanitatem invitantis victam manum, deinde retecta potione et cibo expugnare dominae pertinaciam coepit et: 'Quid proderit, inquit, hoc tibi, si soluta inedia fueris, si te vivam sepelieris, si antequam fata poscant indemnatum spiritum effuderis? Id cinerem aut manes credis sentire sepultos? Vis tu reviviscere! Vis discusso muliebri errore! Quam diu licuerit, lucis commodis frui! Ipsum te iacentis corpus admonere debet ut vivas.' "Nemo invitus audit, cum cogitur aut cibum sumere aut vivere. Itaque mulier aliquot dierum abstinentia sicca passa est frangi pertinaciam suam, nec minus avide replevit se cibo quam ancilla, quae prior victa est.

"Ceterum, scitis quid plerumque soleat temptare humanam satietatem. Quibus blanditiis impetraverat miles ut matrona vellet vivere, iisdem etiam pudicitiam eius aggressus est. Nec deformis aut infacundus iuvenis castae videbatur, conciliante gratiam ancilla ac subinde dicente: 'Placitone etiam pugnabis amori?'

"Quid diutius moror? Iacuerunt ergo una non tantum illa nocte, qua nuptias fecerunt, sed postero etiam ac tertio die, praeclusis videlicet conditorii foribus, ut quisquis ex notis ignotisque ad monumentum venisset, putasset expirasse super corpus viri pudicissimam uxorem.

"Ceterum, delectatus miles et forma mulieris et secreto, quicquid boni per facultates poterat coemebat et, prima statim nocte, in monumentum ferebat. Itaque unius cruciarii parentes ut viderunt laxatam custodiam, detraxere nocte pendentem supremoque mandaverunt officio.

At miles circumscriptus dum desidet, ut postero die vidit unam sine cadavere crucem, veritus supplicium, mulieri quid accidisset exponit: 'nec se expectaturum iudicis sententiam, sed gladio ius dicturum ignaviae suae. Commodaret ergo illa perituro locum, et fatale conditorium familiari ac viro faceret.'

Mulier non minus misericors quam pudica: 'Ne istud, inquit, dii sinant, ut eodem tempore duorum mihi carissimorum hominum duo funera spectem. Malo mortuum impendere quam vivum occidere.' Secundum hanc orationem iubet ex arca corpus mariti sui tolli atque illi, quae vacabat, cruci affigi. Usus est miles ingenio prudentissimae feminae, posteroque die populus miratus est qua ratione mortuus isset in crucem

Brief Comment

It is interesting that this was taken as a story about the fickleness of women, a common theme in ancient times in a male-dominated Greco-Roman society. But many who read this same story now with the new perception of our own times, will see it as a statement in favor of Life, as against the preservation of traditional widowhood prescribed by Roman practice. To be true to tradition, she had one path: To stay in the mausoleum and die on her husband's coffin. To us this seems not only wasteful of the God given life-force, but ghastly as a ritual procedure of dying by starvation.

It is also curious that the situation of three crosses on which criminals were hung, and a burial chamber in which a woman by lamplight watched over a body in the night, echoes in a vague manner the story of Christ's crucifixion in the Greek NT which was being put into its present form at the end of the first century A.D. Non-traditional Bible scholars will consider the possibility that Jesus' body was removed from the rock tomb by his followers, which could parallel the disappearance on the one body as told in this story. The tomb in which Christ's body was placed was for some part of the night watched over by a woman with a lamp, another minor detail.

It has seemed to some people, that this Milesian tale reflects a popular awareness of the story of Jesus' crucifixion and death, seen through non-believing and skeptical Greco=Roman eyes, and this was conflated with another vein of storytelling which revolved about the supposedly mobile nature of the female mind.

To a deeply religious Christian this will appear untenable, and should be dismissed as mere speculation, which it is. But to those interested in the sociology of the nascent 1/2 nd century world, this interpretation may find a niche in the history of how people view the variables in contemporary social behavior. Men reading this story then and now will find something amusing in the sexual outcome of the tale, while I believe women may well see it as a statement in favor of life and living, as against compulsory suttee in a crudely macho environment.

William Harris
Prof. Em. Middlebury College
www.middlebury.edu/~harris