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        |  |  |  Tomás Q. Morín
 _____
 
 Red Herring
 
 
 
 I say “my love” in a reluctant French,
 even though I hate the French, not the people
 who never did me harm, just the nectar-hearted
 sounds of mon amour, mon chérie, that always
 live in the right mouth on the brink
 of tumbling into beauty, a sad truth
 revealed to me when I overheard a socialite
 ordering a café noisette on the Champs-Élysées
 with the same river of honey
 spilling from the lips of a street vendor
 offering directions to the nearest toilet.
 With all apologies to the French, I’m deaf
 and dumb to harmony, unless it’s guttural,
 which is my shortcoming, one of many to be sure,
 and so to the reader whose uncle dresses hair
 in Marseilles or whose grandparents sell tires
 or blue eggs or both in the wards of Haiti
 and New Orleans and Algeria, dear reader,
 to you who wonder why my tin ear
 even bothered with your native tongue
 instead of following Romeo’s lead
 and saying “O teacher of bright torches,” or Goethe’s
 Die Leiden . . . for that matter, which is no less accurate
 no matter how you translate sorrows,
 my whole point was to use a romance
 language to persuade you cher lecteur
 that this is really a poem about love,
 and not smoked fish or the vagaries of words,
 although one could love a herring
 I suppose if the timing was right and the moon
 shone just so and the fish could order a pizza
 for two in near perfect French,
 which I could never do over the phone
 in any language without repeating myself,
 but which my elegant herring would have no trouble
 doing on account of her thinner lips
 and mezzo-soprano which has the power to save
 some pitiful soul from the torture
 of wrestling my mumbled request for black olives,
 mushrooms, pepperoni, from English into English.
 
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